The Return Of The (Aaron Blog) Ing.

The Dark Knight Returns (To his laptop).  

 

I have returned from my absent spell, so to all nine readers who have been worried I’m fine.  I’m actually more than fine, I’m magnificent.  My life is amazing and more importantly it is mine.  I have been AWOL due to many factors.  

The first is that travelling is a full time job.  Seriously.  I’m not saying it’s a soul-sucking chore or it makes me suicidal on Mondays but it’s seriously vigorous on times.  In each country I try to explore and see and feel and taste that it leaves small time for blogging if I want to abide by the three Sacred S’s – Skate, Surf, Sleep.  

Secondly, wifi has been scarce as I’ve been off grid lately in my new home-on-wheels.  The Batvan! (More on this later)  

Thirdly, Life happens.  It really does.  One minute you’re eating cereal ready to attack the day and the seeming next minute you’re eating cereal ready to attack the next day.  Thankfully my life isn’t lost to the day-to-day bore and monotony of what people impose on others as ‘real life’- come join me for a week and tell me about real life when you’re trapped inside the Matrix and I’m doing my Superman thing as Neo.  I try to fill most days with doing something fulfilling and new.  I’ve seen a sunrise illuminate the godly Angkor, I’ve watched elephants roam their natural habitat, I’ve swam in coral with an ancient turtle.  I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe (where are my Blade Runner fans at?).  

The fourth reason is that I’m an official writer as opposed to the writer I declare myself in my mind and here on my blog.  I did it.  Whilst chasing one dream, I achieved another.  I am a Jr Writer and Photographer for www.adventureinyou.com  Check it out, it’s awesome and in fitting with any travellers or hopeful wanderers, people looking for adventure and inspiration and anybody who appreciates life outdoors.  My first article is about hiking in the charming and luscious Cameron Highlands, Malaysia.  My second is coming soon.

I am going to keep posting more anecdotal and subjective things here though because I need somewhere to vent all my weird wanderlust and a therapist is expensive.  

 

So where have the past five months gone.  The first was spent in South Africa.  A country that has heart and spirit in spades and is always striving to grow for the good.  I volunteered at Shamwari Game Reserve (check past posts for an insight) which remains as arguably the most wonderful and fulfilling two weeks of my life.  Afterward I journeyed the Garden Route which showed me just how beautiful our precious earth is.  Then came a flurry of South East Asia Awesome. For three months I travelled through Cambodia, Vietnam, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia.  It was as tiring as it sounds and anyone who has been to Asia knows that there is no slow pace.  It all moves at rocket speed and its idiosyncrasies and cultures are an acquired taste for many westerners – I’m not just talking about the food but the ways, the rules, the toilets(!) etc.  It was the best of times.  It was the worst of times.  The stark beauty of Asia is unmatched.  The jungles, the waterfalls, the lakes and the beaches, to mention but a few of the wonders, are otherworldly and gorgeous.   The temples are sacred and evocative in their intricacy and solidarity with nature.  Best of all are the people.  Some have perhaps enough money to eat and to live on a bare minimum.    What we in the west would count as sub-human or speak of like “literally (You mean ‘figuratively’ idiot) going to die if I don’t have a Nandos this week”.  Those in the south east of Asia smile in the face of adversity and show kindness instead of anger.  An unbreakable spirit seems ingrained into the land and its inhabitants.  Granted that is a generalisation and there are those who want to profit from us gawping western folk like a certain vietnamese taxi driver who ripped me off royally but I was mostly met with kindness in my time there.

 

The route went a little something like this:

Cambodia– Phnom Penh-SIhanoukville-Koh Rong Samloem-Kampot-Phnom Penh-Siem Reap.

Vietnam- Ho Chi Minh-Hue-Hanoi-Halong Bay – Hanoi.

Malaysia- Kuala Lumpur- Langkawi-Penang-Cameron Highlands- Kuala Lumpur

Thailand: Phuket. Having travelled Thailand in 2014 I just chilled out over Christmas which was needed.

Indonesia – Jakarta-Yogyakarta-Bali (Bali was three weeks of surfing because  I want to be the very best, like no one ever was).

Australia-  Currently in the state of Victoria but I plan to see as big a slice of this huge beast of a country as I can.

 

Much more to come from Australia as my partner and I now own a campervan and are seeing all its nooks and crannies.  I have a year ahead of me in the Land Down Under and each day has been an adventure so far.  It’s an expansive land of natural beauty, at its finest with coastline perpetually battling the sea and national parks that feel like worlds in and of themselves.  

 

My next blog post will be about living in a campervan as it’s taught me a lot (11 things to be precise) so far and I will be going back over my journal from my travels to bring some more insight into my life in adventure.  New articles will be published on Adventure In You too so check it out if that tickles your ticklish parts (my ribs if anyone wants to know).  I am always open to questions so to any reading this or any of my ramblings and wanting to know more then please do converse with me whether it be on twitter, instagram, wordpress or through carrier birds (Phoenix are my favourites, NO pigeons).  

 

So that is the brief/abbreviated/shortened turn of events and which I plan on revisiting.  

 

Thanks as always for reading.

 

Aaron Farrell.   

 

Mekong Delta Day Trip.

My dreams of floating down the Mekong taking in the resplendent nature and atmosphere of the life that the river sustains were dashed by the most deceptive tourist trap I’ve come across on my travels.

 

I had booked the Mekong Delta Day Trip through one of the plethora of companies that sell all manners of tours, trips and attractions on every busy street of Ho Chi Minh City.   I had unfortunately missed out on seeing the Mekong properly whilst in Cambodia so this was my chance to see what Willard saw in his mission seeking out Colonel Kurtz.

If only.

 

Buses filled up with tourists from Ho Chi Minh and drove to the port area just outside of the city, beside the Mekong.  We (Myself and many excited tourists) hopped onto a boat and headed for an island on the Mekong.  No sightseeing or guidance as to whats going on just a small boat ride from a modern port, underneath a modern bridge and then stopping at an island flanked by a fleet of small boats exactly like the one I was on.

The day was packed with puppet-show theatrics where ‘locals’ seemingly live the Mekong lifestyle and then try to charge you for the sight or the product of their labour –  “Get to see traditional coconut candy being made from extract to wrapping; and now buy some!”   That was the first stop where I did indulge in some gorgeous coconut candy and paid for a pack to take away.  As did many others.  No one was actually making coconut candy however.  Our guide sprinted through the outline of how its made and took us straight to the cash counter where all the candy makers were to be found pushing the product.  That was the ethos of the day seemingly.

 The group I was part of were lucky enough to see a young local fishing in a small muddied lake with just a basket and his bare hands (I was half expecting *CLAP NOW* signs to pop up every time he caught one with the forceful narration and falsified pretence put on this fishing show).   He was proficient and caught maybe four fish within 10 minutes.  His adoring audience “oohhhed” and “ahhed” obviously buying into the show that was in front of them.  Then whilst we dined for lunch the same boy was out of the muddied traditionalist attire and in a very nice shirt and jeans combo.  I realise I sound uber-cynical but this was all one big stage show when it was sold as a true insight into Life On The Mekong.  I realise my naivety now as hindsight is a beautiful thing but I just wanted to see this grand river that has supplied many with life in South East Asia for time innumerable.  

After lunch we were guided to another hut which led to perhaps the strangest moment of the day.  We were given cups of tea (inclusive of the ticket price) and  were left to our own devices.  I chatted with many fellow travellers and got to delve into other people’s travels and plans.  Probably my favourite moment of the day.  Then out of nowhere a troupe or band or something lined up and starting singing and playing instruments with all the passion and excitement of a politician taking a lie detector test.  These poor people performed some western songs in their local dialect and it was awful.  I hated the thought that they were doing this for ogling tourists and that they thought that is what ogling tourists actually wanted.  After a 10 minute singsong which got more depressing with each awkward out-of-tune note hit, the band swarmed each table insisting on a tip.  They hung around with a basket in your face until each person had given them something.  I wanted to give them a good talking to and tell them they don’t have to do this for us but they would only accept Dong and not dialogue.   Next up was a rowing boat ride down a snaking island- river between grasping tree roots and lizard-laden marsh banks.  Finally, I thought, now something that seems rooted in how and why people have lived so close to the Mekong all this time.  Again I was left disappointed as the history and tradition I sought after was not to be found.  Every local working on this tiny river as we bumper-boated down it was putting on an interactive show for us.  All the working women on other rowing boats spoke what are possibly the only two english words they knew and gestured toward the very elderly lady posing as figurehead afront our boat.  “GIVE MONEY” was their grasping of the english language.   I picked up an oar and began to paddle as I felt awful that this 70 year old woman was rowing with all her might whilst there were four able-bodied young people who would have fervently rowed and enjoyed it. The only thing I can liken this rowing-boat trip to is the Disneyland ride It’s A Small World but in hushed Vietnamese and and the chorus being “GIVE MONEY” repeated oft and annoyingly.   If you’ve been to Disneyland then I thank you for the sympathy.  My fellow shipmen and I were feeling really uncomfortable by the 7th forceful gesture.  It had the same effect as a chatterbox in the cinema – it detracts you from the experience and what you came to see and sobers the wonderment you had.

Then came a horse ride to another part of the island.  I was disgusted by the malnourishment the horses clearly suffered from.  They were scrawny, dirty and full of scabs.  I was sorely disappointed that these destitute animals are obviously just seen as more money for the tourist trap and are seemingly given the bare minimum for them to get along day-t0-day.  My heart panged with regret and grief for buying into this charade.

Yet another insisted upon tip and more product placement and devious salesmanship which fewer folk bought into as they must have been catching on to the rinse & repeat methods employed by the businessmen drawing us all to these small islands.  Then to round of the day us lucky tourists were given the chance to have our picture taken with a Boa Constrictor who was uncharacteristically docile.  I proceeded to just walk away as I lost my newly formed faith in the other tourists as many lapped up having this poor animal sat on their shoulders so they could have a new Facebook profile photo.  I sat on the boat with a handful of other tourists who had a like-mind whilst waiting for the rest of the mindless, walking dollar-signs to board.

Whilst on the bus back to HCMC I contemplated over what I’d just been a part of.  I tried to decipher the paradoxical question that posed itself to my mind: “Who are the exploiters and who are the exploitees?”.  After much deliberation, I could only conclude that both parties were guilty and innocent.  A dichotomy of supply and demand.  An interactive puppet show or perhaps the awful premise of some scenic reality TV show.

I can almost see it now, Martin Sheen’s Willard clad in jungle camouflage and fresh sweat finally arriving at Colonel Kurtz encampment only to have a snake slung on his shoulders and have his photograph taken.  Kurtz looms over the masses of followers as they perpetually chant in unison “GIVE MONEY. GIVE MONEY. GIVE MONEY…”.

….The Horror, The Horror….

 

Since this sorely disappointing day trip I have spoken to other travellers who opted for the Two Day Trip.  Many wholly agree with me on the exploitive nature, awkward sing-a-longs, unnecessary peddling and the horror that was to be had on the first day but informed me that the second day was packed full of sightseeing and meeting real locals living on the Mekong.  They said it was the experience they initially thought it would be and were happy they paid that little more and had the homestay with locals and experienced a slice of the Mekong.  So if anyone reading this doesn’t like the sound of the former but does the latter then book the Two Day Trip and just stay on the boat for the first day as I wished I had.

 

Thanks for reading! ( I’m sorry about all the Apocalypse Now references if you didn’t quite grasp my reference-points but now you have even more of a push to watch one of the greatest films of all time.  Shame on you for not watching it by now too.  But seriously thanks for reading).